Sunday, March 18, 2007

Happiness is found within...

I've always hated being alone. Spending time with myself is something I've always dreaded and tried to avoid. That was until recently when I received some perspective.

I was told that I had to embrace and love being with myself. If I can't love spending time with myself then I certainly can't expect anyone else to. I'm working on that. I'm working on finding the things that I love about myself. I'm learning to find my own happiness.

I love my kindness. It is something I got from my mom and I always hated about her because it always resulted in her giving away my material things to someone whenever anyone said "Oh, I love Jessica's ______." And because she is giving and kind she'd always respond with "Oh, Jessica doesn't mind if you have it, do you Jess?" At the time I hated it. Now I realize that I'm the exact same way and I love it. Thanks, Mom.

I love my work ethic. I love to work, I always have. I love to stay busy and I love what I do. I'd like to think that I am a great leader, at least a considerate one. I got that from my father, he's always been a wonderful employer. He has the most admirable work ethic. I love that about myself. Thanks, Dad.

I love my wit. I've always been pretty quick with my responses and sarcasm. My family as a whole as pretty witty but I think that my brother, Jason, is by far the wittiest. I love that about us. I love that about me. I love that I have that. Thanks, Jason.

I love that I'm giving. I definitely have the southern hospitality and I love it. I always want to give more, to assure that everyone is okay and has everything that they need. My brother, Shawn, is the single most giving person I know. I love that my mom equates me to his generosity. I love that I have that. Thanks, Shawn.

Something I love that I think is all my own is my ability to adjust in seemingly awkward situations. I actually rarely feel uncomfortable in social situations. Almost never. I love that. I love that I make friends with anyone, everywhere. That my friends have always said to me "Jess, you have friends EVERYWHERE." I love that. I love that I am someone people want to be friends with.

I'm learning to love myself. Who I am. Where I am from. Where I'm going and who I will become....I'm learning that it isn't that bad to be alone.