My middle name is "Emo"

Okay, so some of my teammates apologized, very nice of them. I decided to go emotional all over them, trying to lather on the guilt. Not sure that it worked.

I really appreciate your apologies, but I still would rather stay in "sub out" mode for the next couple games. If this were a first time occurrence, I'd be more forgiving, but I haven't felt welcome on the field since I started. Which is fine. I know I'm not good and I'm okay with that which is why I joined a D league. I just should have said something sooner so I didn't feel so emotional about it. That is definitely my mistake.

Maybe after awhile I'll feel like kicking it in a non-soccer capacity, but I don't think I'll come around until after the season has waned. While I know that none of you meant it personally and you all are really great people and folks I want to be friends with, I'm just still a little too crumpled on the edges to feel immediately ok.

While I certainly can't speak for Chris and I want him to keep playing, I don't know that he will. Again, best of luck.

Best,
Jessica

I have to check in with my mother to see if my chosen guilt technique was appropriate and I'll let you know what she says...haha. Just kidding, Mom.